Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Crawling My Way Back From The Dead...

Anybody still out there? To say i've been slacking as of late would be a huge understatement but we're coming up on a brand new year and I think you all know what my main resolution for this year is. Freddy In Space, and for that matter Win Free Horror Shit! as well, get fully re-animated in 2010 but while we've still got a couple days left in 2009, i've got a few things on my mind....

- Santa was very good to me this year and i'll be making a post real soon showing off my horror related loot, as I did last year. Can you say Ladies of the Evil Dead Extreme Edition t-shirt (with EVIL DIRT!), Portable Grindhouse, and my very own construction worker zombie?!

- Speaking of Christmas, wanna give a shoutout to an Etsy shop by the name of Tenderfoot Creations, which specializes in handmade plush animals and lucky Sasquatch feet - the latter of which I got for Jen as a stocking stuffer this year.

This thing amuses me to no end and if it were up to me, the lady behind hand crafting these things would be bathing in buckets of money right now for coming up with and executing such a genius idea. I suppose a lucky Bigfoot foot is a pretty obvious spin to put on the lucky rabbit's feet that have been out there for years, but this is the first i've ever seen of such a thing and for that, this gal gets all the praise in the world from me. And she's got all bases covered - if the Yeti is more your guy, she's also got a lucky Yeti foot! I smell a future giveaway....

- To whoever anonymously signed me up for Suicide Girls, thank you! And Jen hates you.

- Have you seen the trailer for Adam Green's next flick, Frozen? It's been said that what Jaws did for swimming Frozen is going to do for snowboarding and that kinda frightens me being that I just got a snowboard for Christmas and am going to be doing a lot of it this winter. As if I wasn't terrified enough already of hopping on a ski lift. Thanks, Green!

- Every horror blogger and their mother has already drawn up a Best of '09 list of some sort and being that my list is pretty much the same as everyone elses, i'm not gonna bother with posting one of those. But I do wanna know - what is your personal favorite horror flick from '09? For that matter, what's your favorite of the entire decade?

- RIP Dan O'Bannon. Everything I would want to say was pretty well summed up by my friend Kristy in her latest blog post, so go read that.

- RIP Brittany Murphy. If you haven't yet seen The Dead Girl, please go seek it out. It's an incredible film and it's definetly Murphy's best, as far as i'm concerned.

- Gary Busey announced for Monster Mania next March! I finally will fulfill my bucket list dream of shaking hands with the Gingerdead Man himself! On top of that (no pun intended), we've also got the dude of questionable sexuality from Elm Street 2 and Night of the Creeps/My Bloody Valentine (OG) reunions. Can't wait! Anyone going?

- Congratulations to Kris aka K-Fleet from Hutchinson, Kansas, who won the Silent Night, Deadly Night 3-5 DVD set from my Christmas contest. Your DVD is on its way, sir!

- Oh, I never answered my own questions from a few lines above, did I? After much internal debate, i'm gonna have to go with Zombieland (it's got it all - fun, drama, BM) and Devil's Rejects.

- While i've got ya here, what would you like to see from Freddy In Space in 2010 (other than actual updates)? Let me know!

- On that note, to anyone who is still coming to this blog despite my lack of updates lately, thank you so so much. I promise we will get back to business as usual in 2010. Happy New Year!

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Giving You Free Shit So You Don't Get Mad At Me For Not Updating

My apologies for the lack of updates this past week but i've been all but consumed with last minute Christmas shopping since the moment I realized the big day was less than 2 weeks away (OH. SHIT.). I've literally had no time to do anything but punch my credit card number into various internet shopping carts, much to the chagrin of my checking account, but i'm not here to make excuses or make you feel bad for me or my thinning wallet, i'm here to spread a little holiday cheer - and what better way to spread holiday cheer (and get you guys back on my good side!) than to giveaway some free shit! Hmm, now what can I giveaway that seamlessly ties together equal parts Christmas and bloodshed and satisfies anyone with an insatiable lust for both? Ah ha, I think i've got just the thing!

It's the just released Silent Night, Deadly Night DVD box set, featuring SNDN 3 : Better Watch Out, SNDN 4 : Initiation, and SNDN 5 : The Toy Maker - 270 minutes of holiday horror fun spread over three discs - and it can be yours by simply leaving a comment below with your e-mail address and your personal response to the following question :

What's the scariest thing about Christmas?

You have through Christmas day to get your entries in and the contest is open to everyone, whether you celebrate Christmas or not! Good luck and happy holidays to all!

Friday, December 11, 2009

Catching Up On Screeners : Breaking Her Will, CockHammer, Quiet Nights of Blood and Pain, and The Green Monster

Got a totally free day today so I decided to wake up extra early and start hacking away at the pile of screeners i've been sent over the course of the past couple months that I hadn't gotten around to watching yet. I've watched four of these screeners already today and all I can say is, I completely wasted my entire day. You low budget horror filmmakers really need to step up your game....

Available Now

A dude with a fetish for crucified chicks locks a chick in his basement, strips her nude, and turns her into his own personal slave.

Ok, so I know I just said above that I watched four movies today, but I guess I truthfully only watched 3 1/4. I was only able to make it through about 20 minutes of this one before I reached for the fast forward button - and I was being pretty generous by giving it that 20 minutes. This is just another one of those 'torture porn' flicks that tries real hard to be disturbing but succeeds only in making me embarrassed to call myself a horror fan. Is this really what the genre has come to? Note to filmmakers : throwing a hot naked chick in a basement with a creepy dude for an hour and a half does not a good horror movie make.

Available January 12th, 2010

A snuff filmmaker by the name of Norman Cockhammer unearths a Book of the Dead of sorts and sacrifices women in an attempt to transform into some kind of fucked up evil God. He sends out his goons to kidnap two sluts who he thinks will finally allow him to make the transformation but their sexually ambiguous boyfriends soon catch on to his evil plans and set out to rescue the girls before they become Cockhammer's stepping stone to demigod-dom. Ya....

I'm not even really sure where to begin with this one or what to say about it other than it is perhaps the single dumbest and most juveline film ever made. I'd say it's only for those with an incredibly twisted and childish sense of humor but I possess both of those qualities and even I found absolutely nothing redeeming about this garbage. I'll admit that i've never been a big fan of the over the top corny sex joke filled Troma style horror that CockHammer revels in, so that may have something to do with my hatred for it, but I honestly can't imagine ANYONE finding this movie even in the least bit entertaining. All I know is, I don't ever care to associate with anyone who does.

Available February 16th, 2010

A soldier comes home from Iraq and finds that he cannot stop doing what he was trained and ordered to do over there - kill anyone and everyone who he deems anti-American. Meanwhile, on the other side of town, a fat chick who has also just returned from Iraq experiences Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, smokes a lot, cries a lot, and then discovers that her fate is forever linked with the killer soldier.

The only thing I hate more than politics and war is people talking about politics and war. It irritates me to no end and I soon discovered that this film was nothing more than a dude masquerading his political viewpoints around as a shitty horror film. It's basically all the worst conversations i've ever had to listen to tossed into one hour and 15 minute time span. Now I could get over that if the movie was any good, but it was just plain awful no matter what way ya slice it. What was intended to be a criticism of America, our current war, our government, and of those who disrespect our country, comes off as a total mockery of just about everything the filmmaker tried commenting on. Sadly, i'm sure the dude who made this thinks he created a seminal and important film for our time. Sigh.

Speaking of important films for our time which deal with similar subject matter....

If it's playing anywhere near you, I cannot urge you enough to go see Brothers. It's one of the best films of the year and i'm pretty sure we'll be hearing a lot about it come Oscar time.

Release Date To Be Determined

A husband and wife run a small convenience store out in hick country and kill people, throw them in their dumpster (the titular 'green monster'), and then cook them up Motel Hell style. They also put blood in chocolates and sell some to the popular girl at school and she turns into some kind of demon who needs more blood chocolate to survive. Oh and some girl at the beginning self aborts her child and then gets killed but comes back later as a zombie.

I watched The Green Monster only a few hours ago and, as i'm sure you can tell by that sad attempt at a plot write-up, i've already almost entirely forgotten about it - i'm pretty sure that's not a good sign. All I remember is that it was sloppy and all over the place, the main dude was trying way too hard to be Sid Haig, and it sucked. Wish I could be more constructive but that's all i've got to say!

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Name That Santa - Round 2!

Can you name the horror flick this female Santa Claus is from? Leave a comment with your guess!

Freddy In Space Holiday Gift Guide - Calendars

If there's one thing you're gonna need shortly after Christmas passes, it's a calendar - which makes a new calendar one of the most useful gifts you can get. But are there any cool calendars for us horror fans out there? Why yes, yes there are! Here's a few that will look right at home hanging on the wall of any horror fan's room.

My Zombie Pinup 2010 Calendar - $14.99

12 sexy and scantily clad zombie chicks recreating famous photos of pin-up models - it's a pretty damn ingenious concept. Sadly, not all the photos are all that sexy and not all of the chicks are zombified enough, but the concept alone is worth the price of admission if ya ask me.

Pssst, over here. Want this calendar for free? Then head on over to Zombies and Toys and enter their My Zombie Pinup contest, running through December 18th!

Nerdcore 2010 Calendar - $25.00

25 bucks may seem a little steep for a measely little calendar, but this is by far the coolest and most impressive calendar I have ever laid eyes on and thus, i'm gonna go ahead and say 25 bucks is a bargain. Much like the My Zombie Pin-up calendar, Nerdcore's 2010 calendar features 12 sexy ladies - but this time around they're not only fully nude but they're also recreating famous scenes and shots from horror flicks the likes of Army of Darkness, Poltergeist, and Carrie. Quite simply, it's a horror fan's wettest of dreams come true. This is without a doubt the best calendar ever made. Doubting that statement? Then you must not be aware that the calendar features a month emblazoned with the famed image of the creepy twins in the hallway from The Shining - except these creepy twins are of age and totally buck naked. That's what I thought....

The 2010 Hot Honeys & Hunks of Horror Calendar - $20.00

Are we beginning to notice a pattern here? Sexy women of horror seem to be the focus of this year's calendars, but this one also caters to the ladies out there. Each month features an image of a horror 'honey' and a horror 'hunk' posing together and features the likes of Bill Moseley, Tom Savini, Tiffany Shepis, and Debbie Rochon. The inside pages look pretty lame, if I do say so myself, but 100% of the proceeds go directly to the Lynn Sage Breast Cancer Foundation, so i'm all for supporting it. Even if you don't dig the calendar itself, it couldn't hurt to donate a few bucks to the cause.

Horror Film Classics 2010 Calendar - $15.99

What sets this calendar apart from the pack (other than the fact that there's no naked chicks in it) is that it comes with 12 horror movies on four DVD's. While those DVD's are filled with the typical movies that come with those 50 horror movie packs that sell for 10 bucks, the films on these discs coincide with the 12 films depicted in each calendar month, making for a nice little tie in. While most hardcore horror fans probably own all of these titles several times over, this is the perfect gift for the horror fan who perhaps needs a little refresher course on horror history 101.

Monday, December 7, 2009

Dear Scars Magazine,

Where the fuck is my DVD of The Hunger : The Complete First Season?!

After entering a contest (this one) for the DVD on Scars' website this past June, this is the e-mail I received on June 14th :

"RE: The Hunger

Thanks, you've won a copy!

What's an address we can send to?"

I of course immediately shot over my home address. That was almost 6 months ago now and I haven't heard a peep from them since. I know some sites take an inordinate amount of time to get contest winnings to the rightful winners and I patiently thought for the first couple months that that was the case here, but now that we're coming up on the 6 month mark, i'm beginning to think that my prize just isn't coming. Where the hell did it go?!

Now Scars Magazine has my full support and I don't want to bash them or hurt their character in any way, but I felt I needed to address this. And don't get me wrong - I haven't been sitting by my mailbox anxiously awating this thing. I've never even seen The Hunger (movie or show) and this is not a DVD that I absolutely must own or that i'm craving like Edward craves Bella. It's just the principles of it and I really hope that this is just a flub up on Scars part and that this is not how they normally conduct business. I've always been pretty certain that many of the sites out there who host these giveaways keep the prizes instead of actually sending them out to readers and the fact that Scars contacts their winners leads me to believe that that is anything but the case with them, but i'd love to know what the cause of this 6 month delay is. So Scars, just let me know where my DVD is and i'll be happy!

Since we're on the subject of giveaways, what better time to announce the winner of the ThanksKilling DVD giveaway I held over Thanksgiving weekend. He's already been notified and his DVD has already been packaged up, but I always like to post the winners names on here so everyone knows people are actually winning and that everything's on the up and up. So congratulations, Shaun of Conroe, Texas - a whole lotta turkey rape is headed your way!

Also you may remember how the winner of the prior contest for the Natural Born Killers Director's Cut DVD never contacted me back with her address, which unfortunately for her means I had to go ahead and pick another winner. If this doesn't stress the importance of leaving your most current e-mail address along with your entry comments, then I just don't know what does. Sorry lady, but I tried several different methods of contacting you and gave you a full month to get back to me. I was left with no choice put to pick an alternate winner. The DVD will now go to Chuck from Tennessee. Congratulations Chuck, your DVD will be arriving on your doorstep real soon!

Stay tuned for a brand new contest, coming soon!

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Christmas 2008 Flashbacks!

Presented by the corpse of Christmas past!

I couldn't contain myself last year and admittedly went a little overboard with the Christmasy horror content, which I began churning out in early November, and before I get too deep into the Christmas spirit this year, I thought it might be fun to first relive all the fun of last year. I know i've got a lot of new and different readers since this time last year, so hopefully this will be new to most of you guys. If you've already seen this stuff before, why not go ahead and get yourself into the spirit of the season all over again!

Christmas Horror Taglines - Real or Fake? - 11 taglines. Only 6 are from real Christmas horror flicks. Can you spot the fakes?

Santa Claus Conquers The Zombies! - My brilliant idea for a Christmas horror movie....and the discovery soon after that someone already thought of it before me. D'oh!

Why Does Freddy Wear a Christmas Sweater? - Well, why does he? Find out why!

And The Winner of the Create Your Own Christmas Horror Flick Contest Is.... - I held a contest early last December where I asked readers to submit their best original ideas for Christmas themed horror movies. Here's the winner and runner up, along with their brilliant ideas.

Halloween On Christmas - A look at some of the stuff I got for Christmas last year.

And finally, the grandaddy of 'em all. I took on the very ambitious project of posting and talking about a clip from a Christmas horror movie every single day of December - a project which i'm proud to say I saw through to the end. I called it the 25 Days of Christmas Horrors and tons of Santa carnage ensued - both carnage administered to Santa and delivered from the red right hand of Santa. Read it all now or come on back every day of this December and click the link corresponding to that day for a new gift every single day!

Day 1

Day 2

Day 3

Day 4

Day 5

Day 6

Day 7

Day 8

Day 9

Day 10

Day 11

Day 12

Day 13

Day 14

Day 15

Day 16

Day 17

Day 18

Day 19

Day 20 & 21

Day 22

Day 23

Day 24

Day 25

Stay tuned for tons of fun (and brand new) Christmas horror content this year!

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

The Freddy In Space Holiday Gift Guide - Magazines

The turkey leftovers are gone, the calendar has been switched over to December, and it's beginning to look a lot like that time where you're gonna have to start buying gifts for friends and family. On top of that, you're gonna have to start deciding what to put on your own Christmas list. Both of these tasks can be daunting but with a little help from Freddy In Space, things are about to become a whole lot easier for you this Christmas. Throughout the month I will be posting horror movie related gift ideas from all over the world, which you can use either as a guide for what to get the horror fans in your life or for ideas of what to ask ole Santy Claus for. Whichever way you choose to utilize it, I can assure you that whoever is on the receiving end of any of the cool and unique horror goods I post in this guide - whether it be yourself or your gore fiend of a mother - will have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tapdanced with Danny fuckin' Kaye!

Where better to start than with the gift that truly keeps on giving all year round - a magazine subscription. Second only to a Jelly of the Month Club membership as greatest Christmas gift of all time, a magazine subscription might not be the most exciting thing to open up on Christmas morning - being that it's just a piece of paper announcing such news - but you will truly come to appreciate the gift in the months to follow. Jen got me a subscription to Fangoria last Christmas and every month since, to this day, I have received a brand spankin new issue on the mail. You may be saying well duh Johnny, that's how magazine subscriptions work, but it's pretty damn exciting if I do say so myself. Think of it like this - a magazine subscription for Christmas ensures that you will get a gift delivered to your door every single month of the following year. That's what i'm talkin' about! Now that i've totally sold you on the idea, here are some awesome horror magazines to subscribe your friends to.

FANGORIA - 6 months (5 issues) for $34.47, 1 year (10 issues) for $54.47

While it's no longer the best the horror magazine world has to offer, Fangoria should and probably will always be a mainstay for every hardcore horror fan. They're beginning to tweak the way they do things a bit and get with the times and i've got a feeling that the old bull has still got some life left in her. And don't me wrong, it's still a great magazine that I fully support and wouldn't want to go without.

HORRORHOUND - 1 year (6 issues) for $34.00

In my opinion, this is the best horror magazine out there - blowing Fangoria totally out of the water. Although a new issue only hits once every two months, there's enough content in every issue to keep you occupied and keep you reading for that two month drought. Rather than just covering the new movies that are on the horizon, HorrorHound reads like the ultimate horror blog created by the ultimate horror fan - featuring tons of lists (ones you will actually agree with), DVD reviews, retrospectives, trivia facts, and whatever else the great writing staff can think to cram into an issue. When I say you'll be reading one issue for a couple months and not getting bored, i'm not exaggerating!

RUE MORGUE - 6 months (6 issues) for $59.70, 1 year (11 issues) for $74.95, 2 years (22 issues) for $134.95

This Canadian publication is the second best horror magazine out there, and it's a pretty damn close second. It's got pretty much everything HorrorHound offers and is quite frankly as good of a magazine, it just loses several points thanks to its $10 cover price. Eeek, this is definetly one you should subscribe to and not go out and buy every month.

Haunted Attraction Magazine - 1 year (? issues) for $35.00

Yes, there is an entire magazine devoted to the world of haunted houses - building them, running them, you name it. Whether you run a haunted house, are thinking of running one, or just have an interest in them, Haunted Attraction Magazine is for you. Like they say, reading the mag is like walking through a horror movie.

BIZARRE MAGAZINE - 1 year (13 issues) for $69.98, 2 years (26 issues) for $130.00

Warning : This magazine is only for those who are humored and amused by really fucked up shit! That being established, Bizarre magazine has been a favorite of mine for years - although i've admittedly stopped buying it due to the incredibly high cover price (over $10!). Truth be told though, if any magazine is worth more than ten dollars, it's probably Bizarre and with a subscription, you get each issue at almost half off that high cover price. Featuring oodles of naked women (who oftentimes have some sort of deformity or amputation), photos of dead people, and the strangest shit you've ever laid eyes on, Bizarre has always been an immediate conversation starter whenever anyone comes to my house and sees it on my coffee table. It's the kind of magazine that you won't be able to look away from - whether you want to or not!

There's also a UK magazine out there called Gorezone (not the same Gorezone that Fangoria used to put out) that i've never read, so I can't vouch for it, but from what I hear it's pretty good. Click here to look into subscribing to that, if you're interested.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Name That Santa!

December is here and that means only one thing - the start of the Christmas horror content here on Freddy In Space! Last year I made it no secret that i'm a HUGE fan of Christmas horror movies, a fact I beat over all your heads and a fact i'm gonna resume beating over your heads all over again this year! To kick off the season, we're gonna play the first of many rounds to come of the brand new hit game 'Name That Santa'. The below image of Santa is pulled from a Christmas themed horror movie. It is your job to name that movie. Leave a comment with your guess!

By the way, if you weren't around these parts last year for all the Christmas horror fun, have no fear! I'll be making a post sometime this week with links to all the best Christmas horror content from '08 - and there's a whole lot of it!

Vote For Ms. Horror Blogosphere!


The Vault of Horror's B-Sol took it upon himself to host the first annual celebration of female horror bloggers and although the contest has stirred up some serious shit in the world of horror blogging, I fully support it and that's all I care to say about that. The contest has been going on for a week now and i'm sure most of you guys already voted, but I just wanted to help spread the word and throw in my support for a worthy cause. Here's the basic gist of the contest in a nutshell....

There are a lot of awesome horror bloggers out there who happen to be female and B-Sol wanted to bring this to everyone's attention by crowning the first ever Ms. Horror Blogosphere - a Ms. America of horror blogging, if you will. Throughout last month, B-Sol interviewed and profiled all of the contestants on his blog and threw up a poll last Tuesday to let the readers decide who the best female horror blogger out there is. Voting will be open until this coming Friday, December 4th, and the top vote getters will advance to the next level - wherein a second five day vote will be held. It's that simple, so show your support for women in horror by clicking the above icon to check out the contestants and vote for Ms. Horror Blogsophere 2009. When you do, come on back here and let me know who you voted for!

***EDIT*** : B-Sol just notified me that he has done away with the second round, so the winner of the poll ending this Friday will be crowned Ms. Horror Blogosphere on the spot!

And lest you think for any reason that B-Sol is sexist, as a few have alleged, the winner of Ms. Horror Blogosphere will be given the opportunity to hold a Mr. Horror Blogosphere on her own blog. Count me in!