Let me first establish that I only saw Romero's Crazies once and it was many many years ago. All I really remember about it is that a lot of people get shot with red paintballs and it didn't do too much for me, but it had a great story - in other words, it was fertile grounds for a remake in my mind. Unfortunately, one of the only good things about Crazies '10 is the story Romero wrote almost 40 years ago.
Don't get me wrong, Crazies '10 is not a horrible movie by any stretch, it's just painfully mediocre and generic and really brings nothing new to the table whatsoever, thus kinda defeating the purpose of a remake. We've all seen it all a million times before and I don't know about all you guys that say you had a whole hell of a lot of fun with this movie, but I need a little bit more than rehashed ideas, scares, and characters to give me a thrill. But again, it's not horrible, it's just too damn cookie cutter and safe.
Here are some of the main problems I had with the flick....
- I have a strong dislike for Olyphantastic. Maybe it's because of the Kevin Smith stories that have come from the set of Catch & Release, but the dude comes off as a total doucher to me.
- The dialogue throughout is terrible and inspired more than a few chuckles in the audience (and in me), and not in places where I believe they were intended.
- If I saw those fuckers walk down the road together one more time....
- Speaking of those fuckers, I did not care for any of the characters one bit. In a movie such as this, that's an incredibly detrimental thing.
- I think a major mistake was made in having the infected become the typical 28 Days Later style raged out zombies. It would be a lot creepier and more effective if they looked like you and I and you couldn't tell who was about to attack you and who wasn't, ala the original. But I guess zombies put asses in the seats and that's what matters.
- Regarding the ending, without spoiling anything, studio horror flicks are totally devoid of any semblance of balls these days. Here's how I would've liked it to end. Don't click that link if you haven't seen the movie, because the ending will be spoiled! Then again, how it ends is pretty much exactly how one would predict it ending, so i'm sure you know already anyway.
At the end of the day, there were some cool scenes and I can't lie, I did have a sliver of fun with the movie, but it just did nothing for me as a whole. On the Romero remake scale, Dawn of the Dead being a 10 and Day of the Dead being a 1, i'd rate The Crazies a solid 6, all things considered. A couple cool moments make up for all the jump scares, predictability, and general lameness of the proceedings.
7 comments:
I think I had fun with it because it was generic but Eisner skewed my expectations enough with the jump scares to have me tense through much of it. The jump scares might have been cheap, but they worked for me.
Ah crap. I haven't seen it yet and was really looking forward to it but you convinced me. Well that's why God invented Netflix
Yeah heard the same Smith stories on Threevening With Kevin SMith.
Ive been hearing pretty positive things about it otherwise, but of any of Romero's films, I have always felt this one would benefit most from a remake. Still looking forward to it!
I just approved a great comment from Monkeymanbob and yet I now don't see it here. Strange....
But to respond to something you said in this mystery comment that seems to have vanished, I don't think EVERY horror movie should have a downbeat ending. But come on, a movie about a whole town being whiped out should have a pretty bleak ending (think The Mist).
My post appears under your alternate ending.
Haha whoops, don't I feel like an idiot!
Post a Comment