Monday, September 26, 2011

The Jaws Scars Meme!

Remember that scene in Jaws where Quint, Brody and Hooper show off and share stories of their scars? Of course you do, it's only one of the most iconic scenes in horror movie history. Well i've decided to steal from them and turn their drunken scar talk into a blogging meme, wherein myself and any other horror blogger who wants to can share the stories about their own personal scars. The physical ones. So don't use this opportunity to cry about your heartless ex. Spare us, please. I'm not gonna tag anyone and make them feel like they're forced to participate so if you've got a blog and want to get in on the fun, feel free. If not, feel free. And if you don't have a blog, feel free to talk about your permanent physical damage in the comments section below.

Allow me to kick things off!

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1, 2 & 3 : Scars 1-3 are all from the same accident and though I blogged about said accident once in the past, i'll recap it quickly here for anyone who missed the story. When I was around 12 years old or so I locked my brother out of our house and he naturally began repeatedly knocking on the front door to get me to let him in. The front door had a big glass window in the center and I pretended to fake punch him through the window, as we had done with each other in the past. Only this time, I actually did punch the window. And my arm went right through it. I quickly retracted my arm out of the shattered window and tore it up pretty bad on the way out, though I didn't realize how much damage I did until I jetted to the bathroom and ran the bloody wound under the sink. I literally saw the inside of my arm, veins and guts and all, and knew things were a lot worse than I had anticipated. My mom wrapped a towel tight around my forearm until the ambulance came and carted me off to the hospital, where I soon found out that I was mere millimeters away from severing the artery in my forearm, which pretty much would've killed me instantly. When the glass shattered it also cut my tricep area on the same arm and my elbow on the other arm, though those two wounds weren't so bad even though they left gnarly scars. Miraculously, I never really felt any pain as a result of the accident and was sent home with nothing more than a whole lot of stitches the very same night. Needless to say, I never fake punched a window again. For a while I had to wear a wristband around my wrist/forearm while the wound healed and I pulled the look off so well that a schoolmate of mine totally jacked my style and started wearing wristbands of his own, though he had no injury to cover up. Tool.

4 : Believe it or not this one happened less than a week after the window incident, so I guess my stupidity still remained. With my arm all bandaged up I for some reason decided to do a knee slide from my room to my parent's room, not realizing that their was a big ass screw or nail sticking up out of the floor, and I ended up slicing my knee up something fierce, which left a flap of skin in a jigsaw pattern dangling off my leg. I tried hiding the wound but my dad ended up seeing me trying to hobble back into my room. I probably should've gotten some stitches tossed in there but it being so soon since my last hospital visit, I convinced him to let it heal on its own. Goddamn I am a dumb motherfucker.

5 : I was too young at the time to remember this one, but i've been filled in on the details in the years since it happened. From what I gather, I somehow fell onto a giant anchor at my grandparent's house when I was a little kid, and it managed to hook directly into my leg. Yes, I had an anchor sticking out my leg. While I don't remember this (thank god!), I do remember my grandpa years later showing me the anchor that fucked me over and then picking it and tossing it into the woods, as a bit of revenge for what it did to me. He was smart enough to not let me take out my own revenge on it, because I probably would've kicked the thing and ended up with it sticking out of my leg again.

Not too bad, eh? After all my years of backyard wrestling, i'm actually quite shocked that these are the only serious injuries i've sustained. There was that one time from my drinking days where a well placed headbutt from a drinking buddy broke my nose and spewed blood all over his house, but that one only scarred my desire to drink mass amounts of alcohol while out in public.

So, lets hear your brutal scar stories. Gross me out in the comments section below or on your own blog, and be sure to send me the link if you do the latter!

6 comments:

Mike J said...

I would like to believe that most children are mental retarded until they hit the double digits.

If anyone remembers tuba-ruba then they will know exactly what I'm talking about, if not let me explain. Tuba-ruba was a game released by Milton Bradly in the mid 80's. It consisted of a long tube that wrapped around your body with two pouches on each end, and the object of Tuba-ruba was to gyrate frantically (not unlike a hula-hoop) and try to move a tiny plastic ball inside the tube from pouch "A" to pouch "B".

With that description out of the way, I can follow through with the story.

So cut to my fourth birthday, I receive the sought after Tuba-ruba, I had been crying about for almost a full year. I tear it out of the package, and I instantly wrap it around my body. Now at this time in my life I was only about 3 and half feet tall, so the Tuba-ruba easily wraps around my small child body 6 or 7 times with some slack hanging behind me.

I start to jiggle and spin, and spin and jiggle. What I didn't notice is the bottom end of the tube got snagged under a rocking chair, resulting in Tuba-ruba to constrict around like snake, pulling my feet out from under me, causing me to fall face first, into a doorknob.

After 3 hours in plastic surgery, and the grand total sum of 8 hours in the hospital on my birthday, I ready for the day to be over with.

A few Christmases ago, my Girlfriend decided to get me a joke gift. I opened the box only to reveal a Tuba-ruba. I have spoken to her since.

Joe said...

I did it: Jaws Scars Meme

Cool idea, Johnny!

Johnny said...

Awesome, thank you for participating Joe!!!

MJ said...

On my 2nd day at Uni, I helped my floor of new roomates win a crate of beer.

We set up a party in the communal kitchen, got a stereo set up and turned the lights down low. Somewhere along the line I got drunk, tried to mosh to some nu-metal, fell over and cracked my head open.

Because were in the dark with 'mood lighting' so nobody realised how bad it was- hell I figured I just had a lot of sweat dripping down my neck. It wasn;t until I went to the bathroom that i found I'd lost a pint of blood! I also lsot my hearign which was pretty damns cary for about 20mins, but then it kicked right back in again just as someone was about to call an ambulance.

I insisted I was fine and that the party carry on as "it ain't a party until something gets broken".

The next day I found out I was concussed and needed butterfly stitches on my head.
I could forgive my own stupidity if I'd been a kid- but I was 19. Duh!

inSain9876 said...

I was in my bedroom about to watch some movie on my computer after having a few drinks. The way my room was set up, the cable for the modem had to plug in behind my bed, go under it, and across the floor to where my computer was. Well, I tripped on the cable, fell into a fan, bounced off the fan, hit a very sturdy wooden chair with my head, knocked myself out, and fell to the floor.

When I came to, I grabbed the side of my head, pulled back my hand, and saw a lot of blood. Turns out the blood was coming out of my ear. Not my ear canal, but the flap of ear hanging off from a piercing I had that was stuck in the fan! I was wearing some large horseshoe type earrings with a gap between balls and when I fell into the fan it caught and ripped out as I fell into the chair.

The earring was hanging in the fan with a big chunk of skin still wrapped around it. Got to go get my ear sewed back together and now I have a scar going around the side of my left ear.

Bjornabo said...

When I was about eight years old I wanted to suprise my parents by making them breakfast. I prepared all the jam, cheese and so forth, and then I got to the bread. We have a big breadslicing machine in our kitchen which I had been using several times before to cut the break. But this morning I managed to put my finger on the side of the bread and sliced it halfway of.

Afraid that my parents would find out I hid the finger inside a pillowcase and delivered them breakfast. Suprisingly my mother saw that I had cut my finger since the white pillowcase had turned red.

3 hours and 10 stiches later I ended up in bed with a big bowl of Ice cream.