Saturday, March 3, 2012

Get Drunk. Fill Out Random Horror Movie Questionnaire. Pass Out.

Got a nice buzz going at the moment, fresh off a double feature Noah Baumbach marathon (do I lose horror cred for that?). Before I pass out, I felt the desire to find a random horror movie based questionnaire on the internet and, well, fill it out. So I quick Google'd the term 'horror movie questionnaire' and went with the first one I could find, which came courtesy of Yahoo Answers. Let's see how this goes!

1. What would you like to see in a horror movie?

Katie Featherston's boobies ... unleashed. Non creepy dude answer; originality. Is that even possible anymore? I'd also like to see a true shark attack horror movie, with a real mechanical shark and a well written story. Keep dreamin', I will.

2. Which do you prefer? Gore, Ghost, Slasher or Curse

I've always been big into slasher flicks. Which generally also means gore. Who the hell wrote this thing anyway? Interesting to note, one of my favorite horror movies, Hatchet, is a gory slasher movie about a cursed ghost. Go figure!

3. What in a horror movie makes you scared?

Unfortunately not much these days. Sometimes I wish I could turn into a child every time I pop a horror movie in the DVD player and experience that thrill again. But home invasion movies do the trick for me, not so much in a 'this is scaring me' way, but more in the 'oh fuck, this could happen to me and I don't like it and now I can't sleep' sorta way. Yaaa.

4. Do you like horror movies? Yes or No? Why?

Very much so. Why? I guess because I like to come up close and personal to true terror, while at the same time being at an incredibly safe distance where it poses absolutely no threat to my well being. There's just something thrilling about that. Hard to really sum up why I love the genre so much, as it's just something I've always been into since I was a kid, but I guess that kinda covers it.

5. What do you expect in a horror movie?


Unfortunately, these days I expect a whole lot of regurgitated ideas and unoriginality. When I get something different than that, I am usually quite pleased. I'm not asking for much!

6. What’s your favourite horror movie?

I hate this question. I get asked it all the time and I hate it. The answer is always changing and it's way too hard to pick a favorite. That said, the first thing that comes to mind when I'm asked this question is almost always The Shining, just as it was this time around. So let's go with that.

7. What don’t you like in a horror movie?

Characters I don't care about. If the movie isn't written well enough to make you care about the people whose lives are in danger, then what the hell is the point? In addition to that, practical effects are the quickest way to my heart.

8. What would you like to see in a death scene?

Oooh this is a fun one, let's see. If we're talking in general, again I'd go with well done practical gore effects. In terms of specifics, I'd love to see a super realistic, brutal and extended grizzly bear attack sequence, from the initial claw strike all the way through to the consumption of the body. Does that make me a sick person? You asked!!

9. If you were being chased by a killer, what would be the first thing you do?

Thank the lucky stars that I wasn't a hot chick, thus ensuring I wouldn't stumble and trip in the woods.

10. If you had these items, which would you pick up first; phone, knife, gun, torch, car keys, door keys, lighter?

Police take way too long. Gotta get too close with a knife. The torch wouldn't work. The car wouldn't start. The killer would be in the house. Why the hell would I want to smoke at a time like this? I'd go with the gun, no question.

Welp, that was fun. I think this just might become the way I cap off all my weekend drinking nights in. Or perhaps not. Goodnight!

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