When you're a blogger, there are some things you lay your eyes on that simply demand you blog about them, as if some higher power is forcing you to do so. For me, that divine calling is generally heard when it comes to things like awesome movies I see or cool new products I discover while bumming around the internet. But sometimes, random bizarre shit comes your way out of left field and you're compelled to spread the gospel. This post is one of those posts.
I'm just gonna cut right to the chase here. My dear friend Kristy Jett was looking at internet porn last night. Why am I sharing this bit of personal information? Because in her travels around the land of fucking and sucking, Kristy stumbled upon a very interesting little video. Here's an account of what she discovered, in her own words...
"I was looking through some videos and there was Tony Todd's
unmistakable mug....and immediately I thought of you. I knew I had to
show you."
I know what you're thinking.
Tony Todd ... the Candyman himself ... in a porno?!
Well, not exactly. What Kristy stumbled upon was the following video, a clip of Tony Todd in the throes of some pretty salacious sexual activity, from a little soft-core erotic drama from 2000 called Le Secret. Now I must mention that Le Secret is a totally legit film, and Todd never actually appears naked in it or sticks his wee wee inside of anything, but nevertheless if you have ever wanted to know what it's like to watch Candyman get it on with a fine young white lady, a click on the image below will bring such pleasures into your life.
Men, what you're about to see is incredibly disturbing. Women, prepare to be simultaneously disturbed and aroused. You've all been warned.
If you just had the internal thought that the only thing that would make that video better would be if the climax involved bees coming out of Candyman's mouth, into the chick's vag, then please, don't feel weird. Such a thought is only natural.
You fucking weirdo.
7 comments:
Dude... I scrolled down before reading and I cannot fucking believe you did that to me. You're a horrible person.
HAHAHAHA! Disturbed and aroused over here!
One can only imagine what a man with a hook for a hand is capable in the bedroom. Sweets for the sweet. Get a breath mint.
Is it true that Candyman comes when you say his name 5 times?
You win this one, Alex. Kicking myself for not coming up with that amazing line!! =)
Thank you. I actually saw the bees coming from the vagina. Always after candyman.
Thanks for ruining Mister Todd for me. Morbid curiosity got the better of me, and now I'm left to bear the scars.
Um,...eeewww!!!!
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